It’s the other partner who holds the key.
Living with an intimate partner who dominates the relationship and blocks attempts to shift this dynamic can engender in the other partner a feeling of powerlessness. The good news is that although a formidable obstacle, it’s workable. When we recognize that feeling powerless in a relationship is part of an illusion orchestrated by the dominant partner, change becomes possible and within reach.
If you’re with a partner who believes they’re always right and puts themselves in charge, then the relationship is unbalanced with one partner having more power and control. We know from Gottman’s research that one partner overpowering another is an imbalance that is destined to fail an intimate relationship. (Gottman, 2000)
We are living through an exciting time of social movements that impact our culture and gender relations. It’s timely to draw on this inspiration to create a personal movement of change in a dominating relationship that shifts to a healthy partnership.
Recognizing the Mission Starts with Healing
When you live with a partner who assumes power over you, it’s well-documented that such a relationship is harmful to your mental health in many ways that may or may not be obvious to you. One sign is powerless—a lack of capacity to act in your own best interest. Feeling powerless is not a strong standing from which to launch change. First, paying attention to what within you needs to heal makes way for growth and emotional strength.
The healing process requires women with dominating partners to commit to creating a healthier scenario for their life, their children, and possibly their partner.